President Price responds to campus racism: “lorem ipsum”


DURHAM, NC — After another racially charged incident on campus, President Price delivered an inspiring email in fluent Latin, proclaiming the University’s commitment to racial inclusion and diversity:


“Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Vivamus posuere faucibus eros, at facilisis felis congue non.”


Price followed up on the email, reassuring students that “egestas egestas fringilla phasellus faucibus scelerisque eleifend,” adding that while we “sagittis orci a scelerisque,” we must always “purus semper eget duis.”


Some students expressed concern that Price was not communicating with the campus effectively. Upon reading the President’s latest email, senior Mark Jackson said “wait, what does this mean?”


In response to student criticism, Vice President of Student Life Mary Pat McMahon shared that she “filler text.”