DURHAM, NC—Since its inception, Duke’s notorious “Learning to Fail” class has successfully taught hundreds of students the complex art of sucking at life. However, after last semester’s results, professors are beginning to have doubts about the program’s efficiency. Unfortunately, out of the 150 students in Professor Jared Clarke’s “I&E 252: Learning to fail” spring semester, 150 students passed.
“I couldn’t believe it. Students showed up on time and prepared for class with a clear understanding of the material. It was an absolute nightmare,” stated professor Clarke. “If they keep working hard and succeeding like this, I can’t imagine how they expect to live a fulfilled and happy life.”
We also asked Professor Clarke to elaborate on what could be improved going forward. “Some of it is definitely my fault. I’m too good of a teacher. Going forward, we’re planning on removing office hours and posting notes with wrong information. The point is for students to fail at succeeding, not succeed at failing.”
Although the I&E department was disappointed with this past semester, they’re hoping to see better results in next semester with I&E 343: Learning How to Get Fired.