Pfrosh has big dreams to save world, will become consultant


PENN PAVILION—Despite feeling a sense of excitement while seeing the many opportunities that can significantly alter his life trajectory at Duke, wide-eyed prospective student Josh Liemann has no idea that he will become a consultant in just four short years.


Though he currently plans to take advantage of Duke opportunities like Bass Connections, DukeEngage, cutting-edge research and resources for students to chart their own unique path in life and contribute to society in a meaningful manner, Liemann will instead end up as a corporate sellout making six figures straight out of college at McKinsey & Co. Consulting Firm.


“I’m just hyped, you know? I've been working on this prosthetics device for the last four years that can lower medical prices and help the environment, and I feel like Duke is the place that can help me bring social entrepreneurship to the next level!” said the incoming freshman, unaware that soon all of his focus will be dedicated to a prestigious consulting club and networking with executives.


Sources report that Liemann’s is “currently undecided about his major, but definitely something Pre-Med,” and blissfully unaware that his goals in life will fundamentally change during these formative years at Duke.


After experiencing Blue Devil Days, Liemann “can’t wait” to meet his future roommate, an aspiring poet who will succumb to Duke’s suffocating pre-professional environment and end up at the same consulting firm.