DURHAM, NC—By now you’ve probably noticed the oft-imitated “NUT” in a crowell dorm window. But no student has taken it quite as far as Vladimir Chekhov and Boris Bolshevik, two juniors who have decided to show their love for the proletariat by spelling out Karl Marx’s The Communist Manifesto in their dorm window.
Chekhov stated that, just like every other student in the movement, they wanted to choose a quick, clever phrase that meant something to them. “In the end, we were deciding between ‘HI’ and ‘THE HISTORY OF ALL HITHERTO EXISTING SOCIETY IS THE HISTORY OF CLASS STRUGGLES.’”
Some students have protested the message’s public appearance due to its political implications. However, Chekhov and Bolshevik stated that the message has no political purpose. Instead, they just simply wanted to choose something “fun” and “quirky.”
“We’re planning on putting up some string lights on the walls, maybe a couple more posters, and another closet to stash weapons for the inevitable violent uprising of the lower classes against the oppressive elite. It all depends on the vibe.” Bolshevik continued.
Surprisingly, President Price has openly given his support to the dorm window message. “Personally, I love the idea. I think it really shows Duke’s commitment to self-expression and the creativity of our students.” stated President Price, before raising high a glass of borscht and yelling “DEATH TO THE ACCURSED CLASS MACHINE!”
The rest of Price’s statement was unfortunately inaudible, as he was choking on his borscht.