DURHAM, NC—Duke is allowing all seniors, regardless of if they are currently in the surveillance testing system, to attend in-person...

DURHAM, NC—This past week, YouTuber and Duke Alum Cody Ko eagerly joined a DUU-led Q&A with the Duke student body. Unfortunately, that...

ZOOM—Last Friday, Duke mathematics professor Gregson George opened his zoom lecture by saying, “Aaaah! Aah! Where did my body go?” in...

BROWN RESIDENCE HALL—Duke is investigating an incident in the East Campus dormitory that blindsided the administration due to the...

DURHAM, NC—Arnold McCullum, a first-year student at Duke, remembers the first time he saw the Brodhead Center, colloquially and...

EAST CAMPUS—Just when the brothers of East Campus thought that their pledging process was finished, Duke announced an exciting new task:...

EDENS 2C—Despite Duke’s best efforts to support women in STEM with the creation of 39 new Girlboss in STEM clubs, freshman Marisa Hoffman...

DURHAM, NC—After a casual hookup in a twin bed with blue plaid sheets listening to a man compare the female orgasm to Plato’s The...

DURHAM, NC—Despite a rise in Covid cases, contact tracer Jim Mahomes was let go last week after not being able to find a single person...

DURHAM, NC—The Fluke Unit of the Chronically Knowledgeable (FUCK)––the Fluke News’s anonymous sources in Duke Student...

DURHAM, NC—After a long semester of no breaks, thousands of dollars spent on precautionary quarantine, and approximately 1 student...

Durham, NC—The date is October 12, 2020. Time: 4:00 AM. Vincent Price is woken up by the buzzing of his phone. He picks it up. A voice...

Durham, NC—The Duke Board of Trustees recently announced their decision to continue investing in the fossil fuel industry, despite fierce...

Hi. I’m Monday Monday, from the Duke Chronicle! This column was supposed to run this Monday, but was pulled at the last minute because it...

It was the summer of 8th grade when I graduated from my free Pornhub account, finally convincing my parents to let me go premium. Since...

DURHAM, NC—Despite promising results, potentially groundbreaking research in the use of AI for curing genetic diseases in homeless...

WEST CAMPUS—Okay, you’re probably worried about upcoming midterms? Global Pandemic always on your mind? Maybe your grandma is sick—I...

EAST CAMPUS—Sources report that Jenny Baker and Alexa Schneider, Class of 2024, have miraculously brainstormed a way to keep their...

The Amazon Rainforest, Brazil—After weeks of investigative reporting, The Fluke News is shocked to find that 21.7% of global...

EAST CAMPUS—The results of last week’s election are being puzzled over by staff and students alike after the shocking revelation that...