The Fluke News Staff
Girl adds joining a low-tier sorority to Volunteer section of resume
DURHAM, NC—This rush season, Jessica Glad, of the Glad trash bag fortune, felt like giving back. Rather than join the ranks of the Key...
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The Fluke News Staff
- Jan 28, 2020
- 1 min
Q&A: Mirecourt rushee excited to fear own living space
DURHAM, NC— As rush season concludes, Duke students are often left with questions regarding the process. How do deliberations work? Who...
The Fluke News Staff
- Jan 22, 2020
- 1 min
"I'm just here with my friends," says first-year who would kill a small child to get into Cooper
CROWELL EE–First-year rushee Becky Briggs has been telling both herself and others that she isn’t really serious about rush, because...
The Fluke News Staff
- Jan 20, 2020
- 1 min
Despite commitment to diversity, sorority has no Geminis
DURHAM, NC — Amidst the chants and half-hearted embraces with their new sisters, the key three sororities welcomed their latest pledge...
The Fluke News Staff
- Dec 4, 2019
- 1 min
Man supports times up, but wouldn't mind being catcalled himself
DURHAM, NC— Sophomore Justin Blanco told his friend on Tuesday that while he’s “all for” the cause of Times Up, he personally “won’t...
The Fluke News Staff
- Dec 3, 2019
- 1 min
Update: He doesn't like you, he genuinely just likes playing Cup Pong
DURHAM, NC — Sources confirm that local heartbreaker Mason Cooper’s constant Cup Pong requests, often mistaken for flirtation and actual...
The Fluke News Staff
- Nov 27, 2019
- 1 min
Turkey pardoned this year was a war criminal
When will this administration realize it’s going too far? This Thanksgiving, the president used the pardon traditionally given to a...
The Fluke News Staff
- Nov 19, 2019
- 1 min
The floor is lava (and by lava we mean a mixture of beer, glitter, and urine)
DURHAM, NC — Multiple Duke fraternities have recently devised a fun twist on 2017’s viral “the floor is lava” game. It’s a trend that’s...
The Fluke News Staff
- Nov 15, 2019
- 1 min
Opinion: Guys, I’m sooooo drunk
SHOOTERS II — You may see me at Shooters right now, and you may be intimidated by my sloppy dancing and rowdy behavior. You may have...
The Fluke News Staff
- Nov 14, 2019
- 1 min
Frat tries tear gas for crowd control
UNDISCLOSED OFF-CAMPUS FRAT HOUSE LOCATION, DURHAM NC — Wristbands, mailing lists, and bouncers might be traditional ways to ensure frat...
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 30, 2019
- 1 min
Freshman ready to be anything but himself for Halloween
EAST CAMPUS—Halloween season is approaching and no one is more excited than current freshman James Young, who is ready to dress up and...
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 29, 2019
- 1 min
“Being a cat for Halloween is so basic,” complains boy wearing jersey for 4th consecutive year
DURHAM, NC—Local fraternity member Chad Holt bravely spoke out against a popular girl’s Halloween costume: being a cat. “It’s just that...
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 22, 2019
- 1 min
Report: Even white friend thinks your self deprecating jokes about your race are "a little too much"
DURHAM, NC—While you have been using stereotypes of your own race to fit into your white friend group, your latest rounds of...
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 21, 2019
- 1 min
Start ‘Em Young: Shooters bus now stopping at Durham Public Schools
DURHAM, NC—Following the success of the Shooters bus stops at Duke, the popular bar has decided to extend its services to Durham Public...
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 19, 2019
- 1 min
Somebody tooted…
DURHAM, NC—This past week some little stinker let a little stinker slip out. Oopsie! Bad smell, guys! My buddy asked me, “Who ripped...
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 17, 2019
- 1 min
Woke king always asks for consent, just doesn’t take no for an answer
DURHAM, NC—The rise of the Me Too movement has inspired local feminist Charlie Nicholls to begin respectfully asking women for consent....
The Fluke News Staff
- Oct 10, 2019
- 1 min
Op-ed: Is he attractive or just unavailable?
DURHAM, NC—Often times, it’s important to take a step back and reevaluate: is that guy really your dream man, or is he just unavailable...
The Fluke News Staff
- Sep 25, 2019
- 1 min
Now homeless DSig brothers takeover Allen building
ALLEN BUILDING—Members of the Delta Sigma Phi Fraternity moved to occupy the Allen Building on Sunday in a bid to bring attention to what...
The Fluke News Staff
- Sep 20, 2019
- 1 min
Adorable! Local boy thinks he discovered BROCKHAMPTON
DURHAM, NC—Aaron Hartung has been spotted at several parties asking girls if they know BROCKHAMPTON. Upon being told that yes, they do...
The Fluke News Staff
- Sep 18, 2019
- 1 min
Your roommate's not an introvert, they just hate you
EAST CAMPUS — While the awkward head nods, the forced smiles when you make eye contact, and the often absent responses to your attempts...